Last week I attended a networking event hosted by the FSB. I was so impressed that there were more than 160 women attending! The event was about how to network, which I think is a really important and relevant topic, so I thought I’d share my learnings from the two guest speakers at the event.
Networking is often known to be uncomfortable, especially when we picture a room full of people who want to sell themselves. Their tips were focused on a different approach: preparation, presence, and reflection.
Here are a few of the ideas that stood out.
Preparing before you arrive
A little preparation can take the edge off those first few minutes that often feel the most uncomfortable.
The speakers encouraged us to research the event beforehand.
Who is hosting it?
Who might be attending?
Are there people you would genuinely like to speak with?
Having a few questions in mind can make starting conversations much easier. It shifts the focus from “What should I say?” to “What would I like to learn?”
They suggested to get a bit more creative than just asking “What do you do?”, but rather something like “What excites you most about your business?”.
Another helpful idea was to attend with someone you know if you feel nervous. Or if you haven’t got a friend who can join, arrive early. The room is quieter, conversations are more natural, and it becomes easier to settle in before the space fills up.
What to remember during the event
Once you are there, the inner dialogue can sometimes become annoying.
Am I saying the right thing?
Do I sound interesting enough?
The guest speakers suggested to label what you are feeling.
Nervous.
Excited.
Unsure.
Most people during such an event experience the same emotions. Some are just better at hiding them.
Naming the feeling gives permission for it to exist, rather than trying to fight it.
Another gentle shift is to move the attention away from yourself and towards the room. Become curious about the person in front of you. Listen to their story. Ask what they are building or what inspired them to start. I personally always use this approach as I am genuinely interested in other people’s story and it makes networking so much more interesting.
The event is not the place to sell, it’s the place to build relationships.
What happens after the event
Networking does not end when the event finishes.
Taking a little time afterwards to reflect can be surprisingly powerful.
What went well?
Where could I be more powerful next time?
These small reflections help build confidence for the next event.
Following up with the people you met also matters. A short message, a LinkedIn connection, or a quick note referencing your conversation keeps the connection alive.
A final thought from me
Job hunting in the traditional sense is so hard! The amount of CV’s the hiring person receives is intimidating and there is such little room for success.
That’s why networking is so powerful. If you have a personal relationship with another person, it’s no problem to send them a personal message. They are very likely to actually read it. And when they do hire someone, it might be your turn.
I am an introvert and networking takes a lot of energy from me. But the more I do it, the more I train the muscle. I now actually take joy in speaking with these amazing people during a networking event. But I need to manage my resources and come with the right mindset.
If you find networking difficult, you are not alone. Many of the people who seem most comfortable in these situations have simply practiced the small steps over time.
Prepare.
Stay present.
Reflect afterwards.
If you’re not ready yet to properly network, start by showing up. That’s already a huge win!
