“I’m just not good enough”

Are you familiar with this internal voice that keeps nagging and comments on everything you do? Similar sentences might be:  

“I’m not experienced enough”

“I won’t ever get anywhere in my career”

“I’m not smart enough”

“I’m not capable and skilled enough”

“I can’t”

“I should…”

It’s our inner critic that keeps us comfortable and safe. It is there to protect us from getting hurt or even humiliated. It will therefore do everything in its power to stop us from entering any sorts of risk. It’ll get sneaky and creative whenever we expose ourselves to change, may this be taking a leap in our career or making adjustments on a more personal level. If it wins, it stops us from achieving amazing things, such as trying a new hobby, starting a course, dating, changing careers, starting a business, you name it!

My clients come up with the most creative names and visions of their inner critic. For the purpose of this article we’ll call him Benji. This inner critic looked incredible! Imagine a dwarf-like cartoon with a big butt and big bags under their eyes. Benji, the inner critic, kept saying ‘I told you so’ and ‘I told you last time and you wouldn’t listen’. Whenever Benji managed their way through to my client’s subconsciousness, my client would feel angry and resentful, losing their confidence and feeling uncomfortable around others.

How to get control over the inner critic

One approach would be to spot it. Creating awareness and training this muscle of noticing when it shows up will help to rationalise and distinguish reality from the inner critic.

When you become more conscious about it, start giving it a physical description. What’s its name? What does it look like? What is it wearing?

The more you pay attention, the more detail you can add to it. When does it show up? What are its habits? What is its favourite statement?

Drawing out such detail about the inner critic is a great starting point to consider it as a separate identity within us. We can then choose if and how we want to interact with it.

If this content resonates and you would like support with a similar topic, let’s connect and have a chat.

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